A friend forwarded this to me and I just had to send it on.

WHY PARENTS DRINK



A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished

to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he

saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to

"Dad."With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope with trembling

hands and read the letter.



Dear Dad:



It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope

with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice. But I knew

you would not approve of her because of all her piercing, tattoos, tight

motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is 25 years older than I am.

But it's not only the passion... Dad, she's pregnant. Stacy said that we

will be very happy. She owns a traile r in the woods and has a stack of

firewood for the whole winter! We share a dream of having many more

children. Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't

really

hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live

nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the meantime we will pray that science

will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry, Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm

sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.





Love, Your son Jeff

P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at
Tommy's house. Just wanted to remind you that there
are worse things in life than a report card. That is
in my center desk drawer.
> Call me when it's safe to come home.