Monday, September 10, 2007


"I've got an Ocampan who wants to be something more, and a Borg who's afraid of becoming something less. Here's to Vulcan stability."
-Janeway to Tuvok
"The Gift"

Damn you, Brannon Braga!

Star Trek: Voyager: The Gift

I don't call Seven by her name in these notes. No Seven of Nine, not even Annika Hansen. Nope, she is known as the Plot Contrivance or the Walking Tit depending on how I'm feeling at that moment. Later episodes, she gets a name.

It's not that I have anything against the actress, but I have a biggie against the character. Brannon and his great ideas, man. Hey, let's have this "borg character" we're planning on be played by this hot actress I'm boffing!

'Cause no one's gonna see through that!

Also, I'm mad at the episode itself, which is when Jeri officially takes Jennifer Lien's job. Poor Jennifer, who never even got to be called "Special Guest Star". For which I have more of a blanket blame. Damn you, UPN, Paramount, Rick Berman, Brannon Braga, Kenneth Biller, Jeri Ryan, and the fans who hated Kes!

Lost people

So we lost Charlie and Claire for a while. We've still lost Claire. There's some lost people on the island who are really really mean and tried to hang Charlie. Talk about senseless. Lucky something on the island heals people and they were able to bring Charlie back, huh? There's also a lost French woman who has written the lyrics to "Beyond the Sea" all over her math notes. Poor crazy French woman. The tide's coming in so I imagine some stuff got lost when the luggage was swept out to sea, and Jack and Kate's relationship is pretty much lost.

Goodbye to Shatner

I respect William Shatner a great deal. He's Captain Kirk! That said, he's a fucking asshole.

But even leaving that aside, Shatner will always be Kirk to me - the First Captain. That will never change. And had it been Jeffrey Hunter or Jack Lord, Star Trek wouldn't have been Star Trek. I mean, come on! Hunter didn't even survive to the first movie!

Shatner's still kicking.

I say this now because Shatner's out. We all knew this, of course. There was no way he could be in the new movie - they killed Kirk more than ten years ago. He's dead and gone and we have mourned him but he is kaput, okay? They wanted Shatner in XI, fine, but it was NEVER GONNA HAPPEN. He's gone. He's just... gone.... okay?

And now they're finally calling it. Ten years later and they're telling us the truth. Kirk's Shatner is gone. He will not be coming back. Even Shatner admitted it yesterday. So that's that.