Sunday, December 21, 2014

New Blog

Due to some AdSense issues, I have decided to try blogging at another location. You can follow me at

Friday, December 12, 2014

Ten Minute Trek: Force of Dog People

Force of Nature

What we can surmise in the teaser is very very simple. Geordi isa dog person. Which is kind of obvious if you watch "Aquiel" but anyway.

There's something about Season 7. It's the end, and they knew it. The experiment was successful - the series was coming toa natural end. Now we tend to bleed shows dry, but this was the 90s. It was a simpler time, when people did things liketry to train their cats when they could have just gotten a dog.

But Season 7 is full of these little moments. The fun ones. The ones where Geordi and Data are crawling around Geordi's quarters because Geordi decided he maybe wanted a cat, so he borrowed Spot.

It does nothing for the plot, mind you.

And then it's opening credits time.

Thursday, December 11, 2014

Ten MInute Trek: What is a Catspaw, anyway?

Okay, so they found a big castle. And some more mist. And a castle. They can't contact the ship, but Spock seems to feel that the castle they couldn't see from orbit has NOTHING to do with that.

So they go inside and a black cat hisses at them.

Three witches... black cat... castle. More jokes about Spock looking satanic.

And, of course, the ship loses contact with them as soon as they enter the castle.

Big told you so.

So they head deeper into the castle, following the black cat. I'm going to interject some trivia here and tell you all that this is the Halloween episode - the only episode of Classic Trek made for a holiday.

And then the floor caves in and they wake up in a dungeon. Because we're running low on Halloween themes?


It takes them a minute to process that Scotty is pointing a phaser at them. If it were me, I'd probably notice a gun pointed my direction pretty quick, but it's a lot more commonplace for Kirk and company than for me, I think.
Sulu unlocks them, and McCoy realizes that Scotty and Sulu aren't blinking and surmises they're drugged. Spock says neither did Jackson before he collapsed, and first of all, is he really walking around counting how often people BLINK? Also, Jackson was there for, like 1/2 second before he collapsed, and wasn't he already dead?
So they try to jump Scotty and Sulu, but suddenly they're in another room, with this bald dude. "Stop!" He yells.

Wednesday, December 10, 2014


I haven't really abandoned my blog.

It's just that I have a demoralizing problem with AdSense that Google isn't able to help me with. You may have noticed my crappy ads.

At the same time, I am concerned about anonymity with my daughter, and I would like to keep it that way, since my blogging is open.

I will be creating a new, anonymous blog under a pseudonym and will continue my nerditry there.

Monday, May 12, 2014

Ten Minute Trek: Wow, That Escalated Quickly

The Andorian Incident
ENT Season 1, Episode 7

Rick Berman & Brannon Braga
and Fred Dekker
Roxann Dawson

First Aired Oct 31, 2001
Mission Date Unknown


Jeffrey Combs as Commander Shran 
Steven Dennis as Tholos 
Bruce French as Vulcan Elder 
Jamie McShane as Tactical Crewman 
Jeff Ricketts as Keval 
Richard Tanner as Vulcan Initiate

Something alerts the Andorian's sensors - an "energy fluctuation" - which is Trekese for "I have no clue what this means," for the uninitiated.

They manage to get Malcolm and his people hidden in the tunnel before the Andorians bust into the room, but it's a close thing. NotWeyoun leaves a guard in the room just in case they're up to something.

Malcolm, meanwhile, gets in position.

The Andorian guard starts hitting on T'Pol, and Trip implies he's stinky. Oh, yeah, no crush there.

Malcolm watches the Andorian detect three new bio-signs - they're trying to pin down the location.

The Andorian hitting on T'Pol brings up Vulcan mating rituals and fights to the death. Wow, how did that not make it into public record if the Vulcans' arch-nemisisises knew about it? 

Malcolm blows out the creepy face and gets the drop on the Andorians. They start shooting and NotWeyoun escapes into the catacombs with a goon. Archer jumps the guard and there's generally a lot of grunting and sweating until Malcolm comes in and stuns the guard. The head monk expresses his displeasure, and one of the other monks decides to go into the catacombs after Archer. The head monk reminds him, "violence is no longer our way."

"We must protect what is ours."


Dramatic music and a close up on the head monk.

The Andorians are down in the reliquary. The monk tells Archer he can't go down there. He tries to go after the Andorians but Archer won't allow that. "The Andorians have seen your sacred relics. A couple of humans won't make much of a difference."

I bet you can guess what's down there.

Freaking spy equipment.

Of course, they have to do battle with NotWeyoun before they find it. Blah blah blah, shooty shooty shooty.

Funnily enough, it's the monk with his lousy aim who takes out a tapestry that's hiding a door that's sealing a room that's spying on the Andorians there in the monastery the Vulcans built. I guess Rick and Brannon were running low on dramatic irony?

So Archer opens the door, because that's what he does. And then he shows the Andorians what's behind it. Because he's fair like that.

By the way, that is one big, giant spy station.

So here's the problem with this.

Doesn't T'Pol look shocked?

Now, I think Jolene is great. She's a good actress. It's the eyes. You can see a lot in her eyes. Too bad she's playing a Vulcan.

Anyhoo, we're not talking about a little console, this thing is a whole giant underground base.

It's got employees and everything. They must have another door, because judging by the cobwebs, they were not coming in through the reliquary. Which begs the question: why is there a door in the reliquary?

Archer tells T'Pol to start taking pictures. He does not sound happy. T'Pol does it. Isn't there some conflict here? Can't Archer take the pictures? Why does he have to make T'Pol do it? This is her government. She works for them. These are her people. Not cool, Archer. Not cool. Of course, neither are the Vulcans at this moment, but that's not T'Pol's fault. She didn't know it was there.The monk holds a gun to Archer's head at this moment. Archer knocks him out.

Then he has T'Pol give NotWeyoun the scanner and tells NotWeyoun to leave. "The Vulcans violated your treaty, your people ought to know about it." Archer rounds on T'Pol. "You have a problem with that?"

Yes! Yes, she has a problem with that! I have a problem with this! She is a representative of the government that set this up. She didn't know about it, she doesn't like it, but at the end of the day, these are her people! They are defending their territory, her territory, from the Andorians. Right or wrong, impending attack or no, I think Archer's being a jerk here.

T'Pol calls Enterprise  and tells Travis that the Andorian ship is free to go.

NotWeyoun tells Archer "We're in your debt." He does not sound happy.

Archer thanks the monk he slugged for the tour.

Maybe he should stop dropping by uninvited.

Sunday, May 11, 2014

Ten Minute Trek: Trickster Time

The Andorian Incident
ENT Season 1, Episode 7

Rick Berman & Brannon Braga
and Fred Dekker
Roxann Dawson

First Aired Oct 31, 2001
Mission Date Unknown


Jeffrey Combs as Commander Shran 
Steven Dennis as Tholos 
Bruce French as Vulcan Elder 
Jamie McShane as Tactical Crewman 
Jeff Ricketts as Keval 
Richard Tanner as Vulcan Initiate

If you recall, yesterday, the Vulcans had just revealed that yes, they do have a hidden passage in their monastery. But they really promise they're not spying on the Andorians. Really.

So they light some torches and one of the monks takes Trip in there.

Act Three

In the passage, there's a lot of cobwebs and stuff, and some side passages. In fact, in one side passage you can see some holes in the wall, like two eyes and a mouth. Also bodies. Lots of bodies. EESHY.

Trip noticies an archway with some pretty carvings on it. His guide tells him it's the reliquary, where their sacred artifacts are.

Uh huh. Because that's why it's in the script.

So Trip gets to work on his [tech].

The Andorians come to check on the prisoners, and Trip is sleeping in the corner. When they leave, he sits back up and starts working on some equipment from the transmitter. The Vulcans give Archer the last blanket. He tries to give it to T'Pol, but she refuses. They discuss using the transporter to get a rescue team into the monastery.He wants to beam a team into the room where they're being kept. T'Pol doesn't like that plan. It is a crappy plan, to be fair.

Archer offers to share his blanket, since it's cold and all. She refuses because she hasn't taken her nasal numbing agent recently and humans are stinky. "Come on," says Archer. They continue to discuss the plan for when they get the transmitter working. Archer says they're letting the Andorians walk all over them. They verbally snipe at each other while sharing a blanket. It's good for a chuckle.

She reminds him that she has never disobeyed his orders before.

Malcolm is pacing.

A transmission comes in from Trip, who fills Malcolm in and tells him to sit tight. No rescue mission.

Archer and the monks discuss their plans. One of the monks mentions that it would be blasphemy to go into the reliquary. I bet that reliquary is really important to this episode. Trip tells them about seeing the two eyes and a mouth holes on the side of a tunnel.

Which is on the other side of this face sculpture thingy here.

The Andorians debate their mission. NotWeyoun says he is sure that the spy equipment is here. Archer starts yelling. The Andorians go to check on their prisoners. He tells NotWeyoun that he has information for him.

They take Archer to the main area where they've set up shop. Which happens to be the place with the scary face thing. Archer stalls for time. Vamp vamp vamp. One of them punches him in the kidney. Vamp. Kick to the ribs. Vamp. Vamp. Punch. Vamp. He gets to the face and throws something into the mouth. Vamp about Tycho Brahe. Punch to the face. They drag him back to the cell. "Please, I can't stand another minute with the Vulcans! Please!"

Okay, that's kind of funny.

Trip is in the catacombs, with a torch. He finds the thing Archer threw in the mouth - it's a little figurine. Now they know it's the same holes. "You know what to do, Commander," says Archer. The monks tell Archer they're not happy about what he's about to do.

Malcolm has to talk a reluctant security officer onto the transporter pad. They beam down to...

be continued.

Saturday, May 10, 2014

Ten Minute Trek: Finding Our Footing

The Andorian Incident
ENT Season 1, Episode 7

Rick Berman & Brannon Braga
and Fred Dekker
Roxann Dawson

First Aired Oct 31, 2001
Mission Date Unknown


Jeffrey Combs as Commander Shran 
Steven Dennis as Tholos 
Bruce French as Vulcan Elder 
Jamie McShane as Tactical Crewman 
Jeff Ricketts as Keval 
Richard Tanner as Vulcan Initiate

So they'd just sighted an Andorian reflection in the monestery. Who wants to bet they'll go get Security. 

Not me either.

Archer gestures with his thumb at a screen where the Andorian is hiding. They knock it over, bis fight ensues, and then three more Andorians jump out. With guns. Faboo.

All those who saw that coming?

Act Two

They're locked in a room with a bunch of monks. Someone who sounds suspiciously like DS9's Weyoun goes right up to the head monk and asks why he didn't tell them there was a Vulcan "aboard" presumably Enterprise.

The Vulcan says he didn't know, because it is an Earth vessel. "Earth? What is that?" demands NotWeyoun.

"It's where we're from," Archer tells him. "It's our homeworld."

"Why did you come here? Answer me, Pinkskin!" Pinkskin! Cute.

Archer tells him the truth. NotWeyoun accuses him of lying. He seems to think they're bringing surveillance equipment because they have T'Pol. Archer points out that T'Pol is his science officer. "So you'll admit you're working with the Vulcans?"

This is not going to end well.

Archer asks what NotWeyoun is doing there and takes a gun butt to the stomach. Trip backs Archer's story. Not sure what the point of that is. NotWeyoun says they're just proving what he already knew - "this is more than a sanctuary."

T'Pol identifies the Andorians as Andorians, "known for their suspicious and volatile nature." Some Vulcan elaborates that relations are tense between Andorians and Vulcans and always have been. This did not appear to be the case in Journey to Babel, but that's so far down my list of complaints about the way Vulcans are depicted at this point it's hardly worth mentioning.

T'Pol further elaborates by saying that the Andorians resent the Vulcans' logic and technology and believe that the Vulcans want to invade their homeworld. There is, apparently, a treaty, but some Andorians just want conquest. The monks claim that the Andorians think there's spy equipment in the monastery, but they swear up and down that there isn't. They claim the Andorians have been there before and left within a day, but that Enterprise is making them suspicious. 

Meanwhile, back on the Bridge, Malcolm has detected the alien ship and is arguing with Hoshi. He claims that it should be standard procedure to scan for aliens before going to an alien planet.

He has a point.

You know what else should be standard procedure?

The Captain, First Officer, and Third in Command not going on the same away mission to the same planet before scanning for said alien life.

My husband points out that at least by TNG they had the scanning part down.

Malcolm is not happy about the other ship on the surface or the fact that the landing party hasn't checked in yet. You know what else is a good idea? Having rules about how often you'll check in when you're on an alien planet. You'd think, in a situation where you have ages to overthink your first mission, someone might make some overly cautious rules while overplanning.

Apparently not.

Hoshi says he might be overreacting, that they're probably just observing some meditation.

Some people find getting beat up very meditative.

"Where's the sensor array!?"

Denial. Question. Denial. Question.

Questions about T'Pol. Archer tells the story of how he got her. The Andorians don't like the story. And that's when Enterprise tries to call. Maybe they should have a silent mode on the communicators, or vibrate or something. NotWeyoun answers and tells Malcolm - who really wants to blow something up - that Archer is a prisoner. NotWeyoun says that if Enterprise tries to do anything, he'll kill the hostages. Malcolm tries to call Tucker and T'Pol. NotWeyoun smashes the communicators. Malcolm puts Shuttlepod Two on standby and looks up "Andorians" in the Vulcan database.


So apparently, while they weren't making up protocols for away missions, they also weren't reading up on alien species.

The search continues for spy equipment. One of the Andorians has the idea to cut off some monk heads to get Archer to talk. Lovely.

Meanwhile, T'Pol and one of the monks discuss the smell of humans. The Andorians return Archer and the monks reiterate that there is nothing to find in the monastery. Trip says possibly the stupidest thing in the whole episode, "You'd think they could find whatever it is they're lookin' for wit' those antennas of theirs."

Sigh, sigh, and sigh again.

Archer also tells them about the conversation between NotWeyoun and Malcolm. He and Trip are sure Malcolm will come down with a landing party. The head monk says there is a transmitter in the catacombs, and that there are hidden passages where they keep their sacred relics and honored dead. He is afraid that if the Andorians discover these passages they will damage these priceless cultural whatevers. And then he opens a hidden passage in the wall. Trip says it best, I think:

"For people without emotion, you sure have a flair for the dramatic."