Thursday, September 19, 2013

Love the Music! (Catspaw)

Okay, dungeon, check.

Kirk points out, unusually astutely, that the things they have found are "Earth manifestations."

Too bad he wasn't serried about that in "Miri" when they found another Earth, but whatever floats your boat, I guess.

McCoy does think to ask if this could be a parallel development, but Kirk poo-poos that idea - too nightmarish. But it'll work for "Bread and Circuses."

Where it gets interesting is that the association Kirk is making here is that these things terrify people instinctively... all people. That's a little much. Even in the 23rd century, there are things that wouldn't apply across the board. Spock is half-human, but I wouldn't lay odds that fog would faze him - there shouldn't be fog on Vulcan. McCoy should be worrying about hurricanes and falling into swamps, being from Georgia and all (unless they've already got weather modification), and none of them come from a place with a disproportionate number of creepy castles...

And that's when ZombieSulu and ZombieScotty show up.

Ten MInute Trek: What is a Catspaw, anyway?

Okay, so they found a big castle. And some more mist. And a castle. They can't contact the ship, but Spock seems to feel that the castle they couldn't see from orbit has NOTHING to do with that.

So they go inside and a black cat hisses at them.

Three witches... black cat... castle. More jokes about Spock looking satanic.

And, of course, the ship loses contact with them as soon as they enter the castle.

Big told you so.

So they head deeper into the castle, following the black cat. I'm going to interject some trivia here and tell you all that this is the Halloween episode - the only episode of Classic Trek made for a holiday.

And then the floor caves in and they wake up in a dungeon. Because we're running low on Halloween themes?

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Ten minute Trek: Catspaw

"Wind shall rise
And fog descend.
So leave here, all
Or meet your end."

"Spock, comment." (that's a silly order, not that one would be given to expect better from the likes of Kirk)

"Very bad poetry, Captain."

Indeed, Spock. Indeed.

And then the astute observation that "what we have just seen is not real."

No duh. In the last 7 minutes of screen time, a dead man has called for beamup and then his corpse has threatened your ship with a curse, so of course when you beam down to the Planet of the Week, three translucent hags threaten you with Open Mic night poetry and all you can say is "not real"? What gave you that impression, Oh Logical One?

Unsurprisingly, as the see-through witches said would happen, they proceed to be blown around by wind, but the interesting part is that it stops blowing relatively quickly. Given that I know how the episode ends, you would think it would never stop blowing. McCoy tells Spock that it was a "pretty real illusion" but then, so was the dead man, Doctor. Criminy.

Then they find a castle.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Ten minute Trek: Miri - wrap-up

McCoy shoots himself with what turns out not to be poison, Kirk almost gets taken out by a ten-year-old, and they warp away, still not discussing the fact that they were on another Earth.

The End.

Look at my LEGS! (Miri)

"Back on the ship, I used to try to get you to look at my legs. Captain, look at my legs!"
-Yeoman Rand

Okay, let's get this out of the way: lady, your skirt is like, two inches long. Everyone sees the legs. We see all the legs. Uhura's, too. Legs, check.

They say Star Trek did good things for women, but that must be the Janeway years, because here, women are vain, selfish, creatures with completely ludicrous hair.

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Ten minute Trek: Miri, the color purple, and playground antics

Here's a thought.

When you're on a planet full of potentially malicious children and someone starts chanting "nyah nyah-nah nah nah" maybe don't follow the sound?

Thursday, August 22, 2013

Ten Minute Trek: Miri

Okay, let's get something straight.

"Prolongnation" is not a word.

Maybe, though, on the other Earth we never hear about again, it is.

That is all.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Ten Minute Trek: Miri

Okay, so let's talk about plot holes the size of Jupiter. You know, I've always said the problem with Voyager is that there was a tendency to lead with something that could be a whole plot by itself, and then follow that up with an entirely different plot or five.

Voyager may not be as far out of the Trek tradition as we think it is.

Remember this?

This isn't a trip to Earth. It's the teaser for "Miri". It just leads with them finding another Earth out of the blue for no reason and then really mentioning it again.


Thursday, April 18, 2013

We're sick with Ick

Only Andrew, really. We got one of those inhalers for him that is supposed to make your asthma less symptomy. I think it's working - usually if he was sick, he'd be totally incapacitated with a cough because it would trigger an asthma meltdown (my terminology, not officialdom's terminology, just FYI).

He's sick.

But he's not wheezing. He's not puffing on his inhaler. He's sick, but he's not THAT sick.

I love it.

You are Kidding, right?

Shades of Grey
TNG #148
Season 2, Episode 22
Aired 7/17/89
Stardate 42976.1
Guest Starring Diana Muldaur, Colm Meaney
Directed by Robert Bowman
Story by Maurice Hurley
Teleplay by Maurice Hurley, Richard Manning, and Hans Beimler

1. Surface

2. Transporter Room

Let's spend entirely too much time talking about beaming down.
3. Transporter Room
Ooh, yeah, that helps.

4. Surface
Is Geordi practicing his yoga or something?

5. Sickbay
Oh no! My leg is numb!

Act One - Log
Captain's Log, Stardate 42976.1. During a geological survey on Surata IV, Commander Riker has become infected by an unidentified microbe.
1. Sickbay
This is extremely serious. You can tell by my not smiling.

2. Transporter Room
Good grief, more time in the Transporter Room? Did someone lose a bet or something?

3. Surface
Look at this big scary plant!

4. Transporter Room
Wait... Is Geordi the one carrying the stinger without any kind of container when Data is standing right there?

Act Two
1. Pulaski's office

2. Sickbay
Buck up, Number One!

3. Pulaski's office
Some flashback scenes might move this plot forward.


Because the best thing to do for a sick person is to call them on the fact that they're pretending to be brave.


5. Sickbay
Oh, for crying out loud! All we need is to hear "We must save him!" again.

Because all we need is needles in our brain!

6. Planet Hell Set

7. Sickbay
I have a feeling I know where this is going...

Act Three
1. Sickbay
In the eighties, chest hair was in.

2. Holodeck

3. Ten Forward

4. Deanna's office

5. Sickbay
Please, do NOT yell, "You must save him!" Don't do it...

6. Edo World

7. Holodeck

8. Sickbay
He's dreaming about another woman? Ooh, interesting...

9. Holodeck
Absolutely, let's drag this on as long as possible.

10. Angel One - Beata's room

11. Will's Quarters
Oh, knock it off, Riker, she's got three husbands now!

12. Sickbay
Illicit imagery is never the answer, although this hardly qualifies.
And it certainly doesn't meet Riker's definition.

Although, if you recall, this does.

Act Four
1. Sickbay
A new plan? To drag this plot out even further than it already was! By George, I think I've got it!

2. Argus III
Yes, by all means, do let us bring this up as often as possible.
Actually, I'm pretty sure this episode saved the show, which saved the franchise, but still.

3. Deanna's Quarters
"You must save him!" Are you kidding me?
Good episode. Not Marina's finest scene, although, to be fair, the dialog was not all that could be hoped for and the subject matter was rather heavy.

4. Sickbay
It seems to be working.
This is the last act, right?

5. Klingon Ship
Let's fight some Klingons!

6. Guest Quarters
Let's bring this up a lot too. Good grief.

7. Sickbay
"If I'd known that I was going to have to spend an entire episode looking this grim, I would have made them put me in the credits."

Act Five
This is the last attempt we can make...
to save this episode.

2.Guest Quarters

3.Planet Hell
Fun with Ferengi.

4.Argus III
Fun with oil slicks.

Fun with needles.

Fun with autodestruct sequences.

7.Tarellian Freighter
Fun with exploding ships.

I will not laugh at the thin script. I will not laugh at the thin script.

9.A bunch of stuff

Oh, hey, I get to be happy for my last two seconds on screen!
Because forced humor fixes everything.