The Swarm

Star Trek: Voyager

This is the first Tom/B'Elanna scene where he shows any kind of interest. He's jealous because of "Freddy Bristow" (I'm counting the crew memebers, people) and asks her out. She turns him down. Still, it's a moment.

The Doctor also begins his sordid career as an opera singer here. The holodeck even programs him with a toupee.

It's like singing with a computer!

-The Doctor's holographic opera singing partner

Everybody Hates Hugo

Lost

So the food just gives everyone one night of happiness. Charlie finally gets some peanut butter for Claire, Kate gets a shower, Michael and crew find Bernard, and Sun buries the bottle of messages that washed up onshore in the forest.

The Chute

Star Trek: Voyager

And just when you thought all was lost, there was light.

Great acting, somewhat of the original mission of Star Trek - social commmentary - acheived, Star Trek returns from it's illness. It's not cured, and it's not permanent, but for that moment, we remember what it is we loved.

We can escape! If! We! Work! Together!

-Harry Kim (a la William Shatner)

Orientation

Lost

Well, they're good and orientated now. Sawyer, Michael, and Jin are prisoners of the Others. Locke convinces Jack to push the button labeled "Execute" without knowing what he's executing, and Desmond quietly runs away. Won't we ever get any answers?

Flashback

Star Trek: Voyager

Wherein canon is violated left right and center.

Wherein Sulu is used as a tool of the idiotic masses.

Wherein the end of good Star Trek is nigh.

And what do they call those blocks Tuvok's playing with? A Katheera? Why do they persist in making this crap up all the time?

Structure. Logic. Function. Control. A structure cannot stand without function. Logic is the essence of function. Function is the essence of control. I am in control. I am in control.

-Tuvok

Adrift

Lost

I really thought that was it for Michael and Jin and Sawyer, but nooooo. Turns out the Others also kidnapped Jin. I know they wanted Walt, but why on Earth would they want Jin? Walt's psychic. What's weird about Jin?

Yeah, something's odd here. You know what else is odd? Spending an entire episode rehashing the plot of the last episode.

Basics II

Star Trek: Voyager

We finally get to see the baby again. She's cooing. BTW what's her name? (I mean, I know what it is, but at this point she is nameless). Wouldn't it be good to give the kid a name? You know, like "Naomi"?

For the record, I thought this episode was lame in my twelves and thirteens. Now I KNOW it is.

The scene where they start the fire with the hair is pretty funny though. And Tom's pretty good. Wrapping up the Suder stuff - good idea.

And the revelation - Vulcan Institute of Defensive Arts? Vulcan Institute of Defensive Arts? Where they teach "archery science"?

It's amazing the entire crew didn't get redshirted. There's a fucking dragon in that cave. And why doesn't Janeway's hair fall out of it's ponytail? Samantha Wildman doesn't hold that baby like anyone who's ever held a baby would for long periods of time (your arms get tired).

Why did Suder have to bust into Engineering if the Doctor (trapped in Sickbay) was suppossed to be able to deactivate the phasers? That doesn't make sense. And what exactly killed Seska?

Urgh.

I'm a doctor, not a counterinsurgent!

-Doc

Man of Science, Man of Faith

Lost

Jack and Locke are gonna need to have it out one of these days.

What confuses me most is how can anyone possibly keep up with the plot twists? Answer: JJ Abrams. That concerns me, because eventually you run low on things to twist. Then what do you do? Answer: Your show flops.

So Jack's pep-talky "friend" that he met once is down the hatch. Good to know. And what's the brilliant light that occasionally shines out of it? And why write Quarantine on the INSIDE of the hatch? Huh? Huh?

A Matter of Time

A Matter of this. A Matter of that. A Matter of Time. A Matter of Honor. A Matter of Perspective. Are we sensing a pattern here?

This is one of those eps I remember very well from my childhood, mostly because of Picard's big moral dilemma. It scared me to see Picard lose confidence in himself. Even so, my focus was on Rasmussen, but unlike every other member of the audience, I really thought he must have a good reason to take that stuff - turns out he's just evil. Here's one kid who really took the lessons of Star Trek to heart I guess.

Other than that moral dilemma for one act, there's not a lot to this ep. The crew almost gets hoodwinked but manages to catch the guy at the last possible minute because he was too efficient a thief. Why do we even bother to let these people have jobs? Sometimes they are dumb.

We are being hailed, but... Captain, they are requesting you to move over.

Mr. Worf, inform them that the Enterprise will not be going anywhere.

Not the ship, sir - you.


-Worf and Picard (who is really dumb sometimes)

Generations

Alike, but DIFFERENT.

Darker doesn't mean you turn the lights down, you idiots! And where did they get all those people in Ten-Forward. And why can Data identify anger (in Descent) but not hatred? And why bother to kill Robert and Rene? And don't you wish it had been Spock and McCoy, not Scotty and Chekov? Too bad they wrote a sucky script that Nimoy wouldn't touch. And Data remembering a joke we certainly don't remember. Why not something we do remember? Huh? Huh?

Rick Berman, despite denial, knows why this movie sucks. They finished TNG while in pre-production for this movie with a huge, expensive finale. They were prepping Voyager. They were making DS9. Can you say "biting off more than you can chew" can you say "lesson learned in Star Trek: TMP?" I can. I know that lesson. That lesson is:

If you wait ten years to make a Star Trek movie after the show ends, no one cares how crappy it is. Also, you have time to make it, you know, better and stuff.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

-Data

And my concerns begin anew

Trek geek co-writers Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci have laced the script with multiple Trek references.

Yeah, I guess it was funny in First Contact. But we can't just expect them to not do a rehash of that nightmare from Voyager. You know what I mean. The constant "I'm a Doctor, not a ____"

Great. One, right around the time of De Kelley's death, is cool. Forty billion is not.

Anyway, trekmovie.com said it, and they're usually pretty accurate, and that scares me anew. Good job!

Piccys

There's some new shots of Quinto as Spock. On a website.

Written in French.

Hey, nobody's perfect.

The pics are here.

Caretaker

Unhappy with a new treaty,
Federation Colonistss along
the Cardassian border have
banded together.

Calling themselves "The Maquis,"
they continue to fight the
Cardassians.

Some consider them heroes,
but to the governments of
the Federation and Cardassia,
they are outlaws.


We didn't really see much of this, now did we. Did anyone expect this to have any bearing at all on the show? Or did they all know it was just. The. Teaser.

You know what would have been cooler? If Evek's ship would have come along for the ride. But nooooo. Too edgy. Don't want to follow the path of DS9. That would be wrong.

And thus began a series that went to so many wrong places...

Children have to grow up.

-Kathryn Janeway

Ben Cross

He doesn't look like Sarek. I don't think he can sell it.

George Samuel

We all thought it was Kirk's dad.

Could it be.... Sam? His brother?

Stay tuned.

There are a lot of things I could say

I've been sick. I'm still recovering. I don't feel well. My boyfriend is inconsiderate and texts me at midnight. The dogs are running around upstairs, I have dishes to do. I'm behind on my Star Trek news.

And Quinto looks damn good in those ears.

I've been sick

My friend Mario called me the other night while I was pretty much on my deathbed to tell me that the writers are striking. To which I said "duh". I mean, I do read Wil Wheaton, right? So anyway, Mario goes on and on about next summer, which got me to thinking.

Next summer's gonna suck, movie-wise. Stock up on your DVDS, kiddies.

George Frigging Samuel Kirk!!!!!!

OMFG, they're having Kirk's dad in the movie!

That's blowing all this continuity debate to kingdom come, seriously. I mean, there's not a fan alive who doesn't know Kirk's father's name - and not a fan alive who wouldn't like to see something about him.

Well, now we will.

'Cause he's in the movie, baby!

New Developments

So, for Christopher Pike we have Bruce Greenwood. I didn't know his name, but I liked him in Thirteen Days. And even in The Core, despite the abominableness of that movie. So I can't say I dislike that bit of casting - even though he looks NOTHING like Jeffrey Hunter.

And to replace Jane Wyatt?

Winona Ryder.

Well, she doesn't suck. She did really well in Little Women...a dozen years ago. And since then? She shoplifts.

Maybe this is her great comeback.

Civil Defense

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

It's been a DS9-heavy day, hasn't it?

In another week I'll be into netflixing Voyager, and then Enterprise (grumble)

But I digress. Civil Defense is possibly one of the most frightening eps of DS9 because it shows you just how out of control their station is.

Quark and Odo getting locked in the security office, btw, is priceless.

Dukat... if you are seeing this recording, it means you tried to abandon your post while the station's self-destruct sequence was engaged. That will not be permitted. You have lost control of Terok Nor, disgracing yourself and Cardassia. Your attempt to escape is no doubt a final act of cowardice. All fail-safes have been eliminated. Your personal access codes have been rescinded. The destruct sequence can no longer be halted. All you can do now is contemplate the depth of your disgrace... and try to die like a Cardassian.

-recording of Legate Kell